Anyone who knows me knows I love sleeping. Mostly because I’m always tired regardless of how much or little I sleep. But also because I find the fantasy world far more bearable at time. It’s also where I conjure up most of my better writing ideas.
For a few weeks I did not dream, which was weird as not a night goes by where I don’t. But soon after I started to again and in one dream I witnessed a young lady in a school for magic, not unlike Harry Potter, except in this case one could basically earn a PhD equivalent. There were social and political commentaries, much like everything I tend to write. Similar to but unlike Harry Potter, in this world people knew of the existence of witches and like any minority group ever people rallied against them, took advantage of them, or appropriated them.
The idea came on strong and I’ve been debating whether I should write it or not. I am a lover of fantasy things, but a writer of them I am not. You see, everything in my life needs to make sense. I am the kind of person who pokes holes in the fantasy plots because they don’t have consistency. They do not necessarily need to follow the laws of physics, they just need to make sense.
One of the things I like most about realistic fiction is that there are clear lines one must follow as they are based in reality. The biggest discomfort I have with sci-fi/fantasy writing is that I will have to make up my own. The thought alone make me want to curl into a ball and hide.
The biggest obstacle in my life, I feel, isn’t anxiety or depression or introversion, but rather my inability to set my own standards.